Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
We should never set our expectations higher than pizza bagels cause then our night is bound to get better
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline...
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
Amanda, I can 99.9% assure you i'm probably never going to bang your mom
I DON'T LIKE THAT SENTENCE
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
Randomize
