Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
No no no...you park the car, stick your tongue down his throat, slip your number in his pocket, invite him to insomnia, and THEN LEAVE. You go from awkward to epic in a matter of seconds.
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a conversation with someone who just told you they put their cat in the fridge on purpose?
the guy sitting next to me at the bar has a patrick swayze tattoo hovering over a roast beef sandwich. 'merica.
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
Randomize