How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
I'm gonna hire strippers dressed like the founding fathers.
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
I told my coworker that I'd get him some edibles because he wants to rekindle his marriage. I'd better get some good karma out of this.
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
Randomize
