there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
i woke up to my roommate spraying cooking spray on my legs. fourth time this has happened. not cool.
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
My drunken abilities have only improved since college....I can navigate the streets of chicago like no ones business, do push-ups to hail a taxi and instantly become an mma fighter after 3 shots of hennessy
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
Randomize
