two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
I swear to god, allah, buddah and motherfucking oprah winfrey... if I have to stay here any longer because you are holding us up I will choke you out.
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
Ah, drunk me ordered sushi at 3 a.m. for sober me's lunch the next day. EXCELLENT
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
Randomize
