It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize