Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
this girl and her friend just showed up at my house. standing together, theylook exactly like the number 10. this has cockblock written alllllll over it.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
After you puked in the bathtub you claimed you were never eating quesadillas again and you never even ate a quesadilla
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
You are the best. Or certainly adequate for tempering my unholy desires.
That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me.
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
