i don't plan on having that self control this summer
xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
Like, you've got the smoothest dick in the west. Do you moisturize?
Yes I do
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
There's even glitter on my cock...
Randomize
