I'll write directions out on a napkin and slip it to him. Then say P.S. The UTI is gone.... that's not creepy at all right?
I was just standing there and then BOOM! She was attacking my face with her mouth.
I don't get it, man. She treated me like a sexual predator but treated you like a piece of meat.
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
I wish Michael J Fox could read me bedtime stories
He could rock you to sleep
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
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