One of the mothers are the party said to me "All your friends are getting married, you're just getting drunk"
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
She's sitting on the couch buck naked, eating a cupcake for dinner. I'm breaking new ground as a parent here.
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
She needs sedatives and a leash
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
I am never drinking with the goths again.
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
Randomize
