Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
Realization: many of my behaviors would lead to me being stoned to death in a lot of foreign countries. God bless America.
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
Randomize
