Ducking stuck downtown...all the fuxkig roads are blixkded
Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
i think i should save myself the $200 for a prom dress. i mean why bother. its just going to be covered in vodka/jizz/and puke by the end of the night.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
If I ever mention marriage force me to Brazil to do coke and strippers until I die.
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
Randomize
