They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
Drunk me left sober me a shower beer in expectation of Hurricane Harvey. Drunk me is the best.
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
I feel kind of like we’re in a gang and tonight is one of those “people are gonna know not to fuck with us” type of nights. And then tomorrow I am going to learn to pole dance. I’m not really sure how I got to this point in my life… but I like it.
Randomize
