i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
I was just told that I'm the Sherlock Holmes of drunken sex. I'll take it.
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
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