My breakfast consisted of a slimfast and an adderal. My fridge is like an insecurity buffet.
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
Randomize
