none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
Mark my words im gonna be the drunkest groomsman outta spite for him having his wedding on a gameday
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
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