You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
Just woke up on a couch in the FIJI house with 2 missed calls from someone I saved in my phone as "Some DU Kid Named TJ Maybe"
you make me proud to be your friend
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
So I wake up to my ex girlfriends underwear hanging from the ceiling fan and the only thing i can think of is "what time is the game"
Randomize
