we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
Randomize
