Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
Randomize
