I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
Randomize
