oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
when im not freaking out about dying alone and unloved, i actually really enjoy being single
just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
I stared at his lazy eye for so long, he thought I had one too. Then we bonded over our lazy eyes. I had to fake one all night. My head is fucking killing me. NEVER pretend to have a lazy eye.
Either I'm still drunk or the right side of the bed is now the left side.
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
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