It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
Just went to Meijer. Purchased furnace filters, fishing line, red lipstick and pregnancy test. And if my purchase alone wasn't classy enough, I took the pregnancy test in the Meijer bathroom because Im on my way to the bar and wanted to know if that was a good idea or not. Cheers to no babies!
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