He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
You had me at "let me see your balls"
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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