You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
I just pulled a feather out of my vagina.
I am not joking.
you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
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