i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
Today the house voted to defund Planned Parenthood but to continue funding NASCAR. I fucking hate everything.
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
