So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
Randomize
