check it out our google latitudes are spooning
I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
i need a shirt that says "I fuck trainwrecks"
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
I may or may not have just sent the bartender a pic of me in my slutty cheerleader costume with the caption "rah rah ree, gimme yo d"
nobody understands how my tooth became embedded in the ceiling last night.
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
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