and thats when i went through the window and a shard of glass got stuck in my ass. the doctor said it was the best injury hed seen all month. i am a champion of life.
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
i now understand why vodka
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
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