Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
Ahh you know it's going to be a long day when you mistake a beer for a sprite at 10:30 in the morning while babysitting
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
Randomize
