It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
This chick walked up to me in the bar and started making out with me, then grabbed my drink while I wasn't looking and walked off.
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
Randomize
