well I can't set my house on fire every night
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
Aren't you proud to know somebody who texts you "manifold facade" while dumping frozen colada mix into a blender of rum
You know what a wolf looks like when it kills a small animal? How it shakes it around in it's mouth? I did that to a bag of Taco Bell last night
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
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