Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
woke up to an unread text message i sent to myself: "brreakfdast..pork and ice cream."
I like how the only thing you spelled correctly is "i'm tequila"
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
Randomize