i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
I'm pretty sure that when my parents bought me those savings bonds they thought it would go towards something useful like tuition. Not your bail.
I told you I'd buy you lunch.
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
Found trail of ibuprofen on ground. I'm like the intervention version of e.t.
I'm like a magical alcohol dispenser. I pulled this kahlua out of my vagina.
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
Yeah if I don't text back. I'm eating. sleeping. Or lifting. Or drinking. Or playing call of duty. Like shit man
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
Randomize
