so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
DUDE, DID YOU KNOW YOU CAN JUST RENT AN ELEPHANT???
Oh God.
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
I went looking for them and I pulled my pants down and peed on the lawn. I found my phone in the same spot in the morning.
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
Randomize
