oh god the rape fog is back!
I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
I just found 51 cents in my bed. Did you leave me a tip?
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like running into your ex boyfriend at the liquor store at 3 in the afternoon.
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
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