I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
Drunk puking in my bathtub has plugged it up for the third time this year. I hate these calls to my landlord.
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
I had a dream I got back with Amanda. And then cheated on her the same day. Even my conscious is a dick
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
Randomize
