im drinking this country out of the recession.
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
I’m really upset they canceled the conference. Since the divorce I’ve been working out, I bought cute new outfits and even found a bikini I liked. Now it’s all online. You can’t get laid at a webinar
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