We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
The second he texted me with "*dry humps you!*" I knew any relationship we might have had was over.
I just got a standing ovation when i made it to work on New Years Day. good thing?
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
Randomize
