We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
Stop calling me, Mom. I'm in his closet. You're gonna blow my cover and I'm about to catch this lying SOB.
DONT YOU DARE YELL AT ME. YOU'RE THE ONE WHO TRIED TO PAY FOR THE CAB WITH YOUR PANERA REWARDS CARD.
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
Randomize