Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
Randomize
