I smelled like jager and penis. The only cure was a pack of camels and plan b.
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
Can't decide which I like more. Telling a girl she's pregnant or telling her she has herpes. It's the little things that make medicine tolerable.
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
And regarding bottomless mimosas stopping at 1 pm, there was a chick who drove her car into the back of the bar. Blame that bitch, not you peeing in the koi pond.
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
Randomize
