How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
I'm driving in the middle of nowhere, and I just saw a stuffed Barney hanging from a noose on a tree. Maybe I should turn around.
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
Randomize
