Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
How can I explain how nice he is to you? ...like, I'm going to have to have my world famous why being a douche is sexy talk.
Send help, water and tortillas.
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
Randomize
