Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
she smelled like a LAN party
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
You tried tipping the cashier at Cook Out by shoving a dollar bill down his shirt and yelling "Magic Mike"
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
like, you weren't just lying there, you were wrapped in what appeared to be the skin of a wolf, chanting doomsday prophecies
THE END IS NEIGH
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
Randomize
