Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
No one would take shots with Caroline so she asked the bartender for like 20 jagerbombs and then shouted "JAGERBOMBS FOR HOMELESS ANIMALS BENEFIT" and everyone started doing them with her
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
I'm a bit broke right now... Would it be OK if I pay you in champagne and Xanax?
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
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