I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
I wish there was a tumbleweed emoji. Because that would describe my vagina.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
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