I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
How bad is the voicemail?
You graded my boobs.... C minus. Asshole.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
He just snapchatted me a picture of his cock. The angle makes it look like a freakin skyscraper. Thinking of photoshopping a little monkey on it.
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
Imma do four shots of whisky within two minutes and pass out. Otherwise this'll go badly.
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
I just timed my pee with a stop watch. From when the main stream started to ended. It was 45.1 seconds. This is the truth trust me.
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
