let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
you mean i was at the winter classic?
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU CAUGHT A TAXI HOME. SARAH SAID THE POLICE DROPPED YOU OFF.
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
Some guy in the bathroom just took his shirt off and proceeded to tell me the story behind all of his stab wounds. That's what I get for making small talk
I had a dream about that dude. It was the first time I had a dream about him since the tryst.
The tryst?
The hookup. I like using sophisticated words for my foolish decisions. Makes me retain some dignity.
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
I just gargled with NyQuil
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
Randomize