Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
We should be flying into LAX instead so when we land I can turn to the right and see the Hollywood sign
You can't even see the fuckin Hollywood sign from LAX. guess she never got the memo
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
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