Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
He's like the fucking Houdini of bras. Not only did I not feel him take it off I didn't find it until two days later.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Just when I thought we may have our first low-key night together, I sang an Aladdin karaoke song to a bunch of roller derby girls, you took shots with married women, and we both fell asleep in our offices.
Randomize
