It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
Dude I just heard my boss singing from the bathroom "I love making poop"
so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
I just inadvertently flirted with my coworker's 20-year old son. I've known him since he was 14, yet suddenly he looked different.
You are nothing if not reliable.
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
Please don't pee your pants in the cab. One more time, and im pretty sure the cab companies will refuse to pick you up anymore
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
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