Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
I wish there was a morning after pill that made you instantly sober
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
Randomize
