My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
Saw a girl on a walk of shame bend down and look in a pizza box by a trash can to see if there was still a slice left. That's when you know
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
Randomize
